“When I confronted him and brought the subject up in a conversation, I was made to feel that it was my fault that our relationship was falling apart, and that I was the reason my fiance was looking elsewhere. Due to cultural taboos, I was worried about what family and friends would say about me, as a women, if my enagement was to be called off. I was worried people would point fingers not just at me, but also my family. I was worried about the shame this would bring to me and my family and what the community would say about us. My world was collapsing I had nowhere to go or anyone to talk to, until I came across the Sikh Helpline.”
We have been engaged for three years now, and it was a second marriage for the both of us. Things were great between us and our families. Then over the last few weeks, I noticed a lot of changes in my fiance. His personality was changing, he became more abrupt and began hiding things from me lying to me, and he was declining my calls and not responding to my message. I had suspicions that he was having an affair with another woman and with the continuation of his unusual behavior confirmed my suspicions.
“When I confronted him and brought the subject up in a conversation, I was made to feel that it was my fault that our relationship was falling apart, and that I was the reason my fianc? was looking elsewhere. In Sikhi, adultery is a sin, and I would never dream of doing this to someone else, but it was happening to me. My world was collapsing I had nowhere to go or anyone to talk to, until I came across the Sikh Helpline.The phenji?s that I spoke had taken a lot of time to help me and she listened to my problems and helped me through a difficult time. It was so difficult and heart breaking to put my family through the pain that I was going through.”
The call handler that I spoke had taken a lot of time to help me and she listened to my problems and helped me through a difficult time. It was so difficult and heart breaking to put my family through the pain that I was going through, but the Sikh Helpline supported me when telling my family about what had happened and also supported them to see that the fear of shame and or loss of honour from the community is not a reason to suffer in silence. I have been in regular contact with the Sikh Helpline for many months now adn they have shown me the light and given me a lot of support which was non-judgmental and friendly. The Sikh Helpline has been a blessing for me, I really needed someone to listen to me and understand me. The Sikh Helpline is easily accessible, the call handlers are here to help anyone, from any background, who need someone to talk to. May God bless the Sikh helpline to carry on doing a great job, helping people like me through such difficult times.
The message that our team received from the caller above after getting through this time of hardship…
“Thank you Sikh Helpline, you have helped a falling sister rise again. Only god knows how you much you have helped me. I believe that god sent you my way??
I dont know what I would have done without you.
I am finding the routes that maybe my parents did not instill in me as a child, and because of a bad time in my life it has now led me to the Sikh Helpline where I have met friends rather than strangers but it has also led me back to find my own path in life.”
DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR TO YOU? ARE YOU OR SOMEONE WHO YOU KNOW GOING THROUGH THIS OR SOMETHING SIMILAR? PLEASE DO NOT SUFFER IN SILENCE, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE HERE TO HELP AT THE SIKH HELPLINE, 24 HOURS A DAY, 7 DAYS A WEEK. PLEASE CONTACT US USING ONE OF THE METHODS ON OUR CONTACT US PAGE.